Psycho Monkey
Member of the Literary Elite Four
What? No, my avi is Lelouch Lamperouge from Code Geass.
Anyway, I wanted to post these last two chapters last night but a nasty headache cancelled those plans. But the important thing is they're here now.
Chapter 28: It’s A Trap!
Two months had passed since that fateful night at the Tin Tower. During that time my team became a lot more unified and better adapted to working together. We were able to pull off strategies at a moment’s notice that would have required a few minutes for us to talk out before. I also noticed that Chane stuttered less as she got more comfortable around us. I say less because she still gets nervous easily.
What hasn’t changed is that Eve will screw with our heads whenever possible, and Zack still shamelessly flirts with her, Chane, and just about every other human female we come across. I don’t know how Raiden puts up with us. Zack has also started leaving Lloyd outside of his Pokéball like I do with Axel. He said that until he met me, he thought all trainers kept their Pokémon in Pokéballs at all times. Being a former Ranger, it’s more comfortable having his partner out with him. As we all soon learned, Lloyd is as much of a Casanova as his trainer.
As for me, I have been training myself to control Dragon-Forme. While I don’t have complete mastery yet, I at least don’t become a berserker anymore unless I’m really riled up. Which brings up something I have learned about myself while doing this training. Prof. Himee was wrong about me, it isn’t anger that triggers the change, it’s battle lust. Even when I feel excited about combat, I’ve tended to transform. That adrenaline rush one gets right before a battle, that fight or flight response, whether you want to kill your enemy or if you’re doing it for fun, that is what activates Dragon-Forme. At least my rampages are limited now.
I even bought a book recently written by the Blackthorn City Dragon Clan Elder titled “The Myths, Legends, and Truths About Dragon Pokémon” with extensive detail on Dragon-types from stories about them, powers and abilities, and even sections on how to raise one. Sure it isn’t a scientific journal, but the man is still an expert as far as anyone else is concerned, plus the words are easier to understand. I figured this would help, not only with my training, but understanding myself as well.
But I’ve digressed long enough. It was now October, and on this particularly chilly night the five of us were on stakeout at Vermillion Harbor ready to do a drug bust on a Rocket cargo ship that was bringing some nasty stuff to Kanto from the Sevii Islands.
“So then the nurse says Lloyd has Pokérus and I’m like ‘Dammit Lloyd! I told you not to go after that Floatzel!’ Then the nurse says ‘No, no. Pokérus isn’t like that. It’s just a harmless bug Pokémon pick up from time to time like a human cold. It should clear up in a couple of days.’ Then Lloyd gives me an ‘I’m right, you’re wrong’ look.” Zack rambled as we waited with his Golduck nodding at every word proving his validity.
To pass the time we, or I should say Zack and I, shared stories of some of our past adventures. The girls and Raiden didn’t seem as interested in sharing as we were. Unfortunately story time was over as I noticed a black freighter pulling into the docks. The others noticed too so we wordlessly got into formation to ambush tonight’s victims.
As expected, people dressed in Rocket uniforms crawled onto the pier like the ants they were to unload their cargo. Or rather make their Machokes, Machamps, Poliwraths, Tentacruels, and in one case a Vigoroth, do all the heavy lifting. Lazy scum.
“Is everyone ready?” Raiden’s voice rang in my ear as we all now wore two way ear pieces for better communication.
“Yes Master Raiden!” I answered readily.
“Alright, launch Elemental Strike!” he commanded after a few seconds from getting everyone else’s responses.
“Elemental Strike it is!” I turned to Axel. “Go for it!” The Infernape opened his mouth blasting a Flamethrower at the Rockets. His attack was joined by a Hydro Pump from Lloyd, a Seed Bomb from Izzy, a Shadow Ball from Diva, and a Charge Beam from which ever Electric-type Raiden was using at the moment.
The criminals scattered in confusion and shock as the five attacks came at them from all directions. Of course we weren’t aiming for them (yet), we were targeting their Pokémon and the crates they carried. Axel’s Flamethrower hit a Machoke in its right arm causing it to drop its cargo. The box shattered when it hit the ground leaving its contents to scatter across the pier. Then the monkey burned that too. Similar results were met from my teammates.
“Alright! Show yerselves! We know ye’re out there so come out!” demanded one of the Rockets pulling a whip off his waist.
“Can I Master Raiden? I mean he did ask us.” I inquired into my earpiece.
“*Ugh* You are such a child. Must you always be so melodramatic?” Eve reprimanded from her end.
“Yup!” I responded cheerfully after a giggle.
“I hear you up there mocking me!” roared the Rocket.
“Well as you have already blown your position, go for it.” allowed Raiden. “We’ll be with you shortly.”
“Yoink!” I shouted jumping down from my perch into the open. As expected, they all looked a bit unnerved seeing a member of Team Neos. They regained their composures a lot sooner than I thought they would.
“There’s only one! Vigoroth! Attack!” yelled a female Rocket. The white furred Wild Monkey Pokémon charged at me with its claws bared presuming to tear me apart.
“A monkey battle is it? Axel! Double Kick!” I called.
“Attack!” shouted the Flame Pokémon jumping into the fray with his leg extended. His foot smashed directly into Vigoroth’s face followed by his other foot as he kicked off the shaggy haired baboon. “Is that it?” lamented Axel when he realized the other monkey was down for the count.
“Bastard you’ll pay for that! Get ‘im!” yelled another Rocket sending the remaining Pokémon after us.
“You may want to get off the ground.” Eve suggested. I grabbed Axel by his hand and jumped up just as a large bipedal blue rabbit with small spikes running down her back smashed into the pier sending tremors through the ground which cracked up the concrete and splintered the wood.
As I landed, Eve jumped off the back of her Nidoqueen. “Someone had to stop you from stealing the spotlight again.” she teased.
“But I have to steal the show. I am the main character after all.” I said casually.
“Of what? Your own twisted fantasy?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow. I smiled and nodded. “Freak.” muttered Eve rolling her eyes.
“Screw the Pokémon! These guys could never dodge a bullet!” shouted the previous Rocket pulling out a hand gun. Before he could even pull the trigger, the firearm was surrounded in a pink glow and yanked from his hands.
“I… I won’t let you hurt them!” Chane defended standing with the crescent moon shaped Pokémon Luna.
“Hey guess what? All their Pokémon are weak to Water-types!” pointed out another Rocket.
“Good eye.” complemented the one with the whip. “All Poliwraths and Tentacruels! Attack them with your Water moves!” he commanded. Within seconds Bubble Beams, Water Pulses, Water Guns, and Hydro Pumps were heading right for us.
“Protect!” called Chane. In an instant the six of us were surrounded by a pale pink barrier that resembled the moonlight on a hazy night.
“Hate to say it, but the Rocket’s right. I recommend you all take the high ground before I call my next attack.” warned Zack from his end. We each turned to eachother and nodded in agreement. Eve and Chane returned their Pokémon and then all of us ran the opposite direction of the harbor.
“Look they’re retreating!” I heard a foolish Rocket cheer. She won’t be laughing long. I turned around to see a large tidal wave advancing rapidly to shore with a Golduck riding it. The criminals all screamed when they saw it coming at them. Too bad they noticed too late as gallons of water came crashing down on them.
“They’re all yours Raiden!” Zack called. All at once six different sets of Thunder Bolts struck the soaked crooks and their Pokémon knocking all of them unconscious.
“Mission accomplished.” Raiden announced. Already? Either those guys were weak or we’re just that awesome. I’m going with both.
“Not yet.” I said walking to the Rocket vessel that had been lucky not to capsize with Lloyd’s Surf. “Axel.” I said turning to my Infernape.
“Understood.” he said blasting the hull with Flamethrower until there was a large glowing orange blotch on the side of the ship. Next I sent out Beldum and told it to smash through the weakened side with Iron Head followed by a Take Down to the bottom of the ship. The attack did no damage that I know of to the vessel, but it did force the hole we made to sea level causing the ship to take on water until it sank into the harbor.
“Now mission accomplished.” I said. Rather than kill the Rockets, we just left them for the police to handle. While I hated just letting them go, I really had no other choice in the matter. At least I got to destroy their ship and cargo.
-----------------------
The following day my squad and I were enjoying our lunch in a Vermillion food court called Harbor Place. We appeared to be just an ordinary group of trainers having a meal together. Harbor Place was pretty nice being two floors with food stalls around every corner serving all kinds of different yummies. In the center of the food court were tables for the patrons to sit at. There were also tables on a balcony outside, but being early Fall not many people were out there.
The seven of us were inside crowded around a long table fit for eight. On my side was Lloyd on the right end, Zack, me, and Axel on the left end. On the other side was Chane across from me and to her left Raiden followed by Eve on the end across from Lloyd. Zack had cracked a joke about Raiden pimpin’ it up with the ladies. Raiden responded with a blank look followed by a head shake.
“You know it to be true Raiden. Someone as devilishly handsome as you could get any-” Zack paused midsentence as a cute girl with short black hair wearing a pink sweater and tight jeans walked passed our table. His blue eyes followed the girl until he actually had to move his head to keep up with her. “Excuse me.” he apologized getting up from the table and chasing after her.
“You are such a womanizer Kaguya.” commented Eve shaking her head.
“Hey cutie. Are you eating alone? I’m Zack Kaguya. Mind if I join you?” inquired Zack when she sat down.
“Cutie?” she repeated with a confused look. “I’m sorry, I’m actually straight.”
“So am I. All this is is a casual lunch. We don’t have to call it a date if you don’t want to Miss.” he continued.
“Miss? I think you’re confused. I’m a guy.” HE stated matter-of-factly. Zack’s eyes got huge and his lower lip started quivering like he was about to freak out. Eve, Axel, and I on the other hand were laughing so hard we were crying and could barely breathe. I really shouldn’t be laughing though. I thought that was a girl too… It’s still funny as hell! Chane was bright red from such an odd revelation while Raiden had his face in his hand shaking his head.
“How embarrassing.” he sighed.
“This can’t be! You’re just messing with me right?” Zack asked in a panic. The Bishie responded by lifting up his sweater to show off a well toned chest and abs.
“With a body like this I’m either a dude, or I really need to lay off the steroids.” he joked pulling his sweater back down.
“So those A-cups I noticed were pec size not breast size.” analyzed Zack. “But why the hell must you where pink and tight pants?”
“Because only real men wear pink and these jeans are comfy.” The Bishie answered. “I’m sorry you got confused Mister… Kaguya was it?”
“Don’t worry about it. Zacky-boy is just bi-curious.” Eve teased with a giggle. I couldn’t help but snicker along with her.
“It’s not funny!” Zack whined looking at us. He turned back to the Gender Bender clearing his throat. “Look, I’m sorry for putting you through suck an awkward situation like this. Then again, seeing as how you’re probably the spitting image of your mother, you probably get this a lot.”
“Actually I’m told I look more like my father, and you are the first guy to ever come on to me.” Once again, hilarity ensued at our table as yet another nail was added to Zack’s coffin of shame. He just can’t get a break with this guy. Then I noticed Mr. Bishie looking our way. “Are any of those Pokémon yours?” he asked Zack.
“Yeah, the Golduck, why?” he answered unaware of the fact that this guy was most likely a fellow trainer looking for a battle.
“Battle?” the Gender Bender inquired holding up a black topped Pokéball with a yellow crescent moon on it. “If you win, it will at least give you back some of your pride. But if I win…” he trailed looking back at the table. “…I get to go on a date with the cute brunette in the back.” All of us turned to Chane.
“M-me? N-no! I… I can’t. I… I’m not old enough! I’m not allowed to go on dates until I’m eighteen.” she stammered nervously. We all looked at her with confusion. Not allowed to date? Even I find that a bit ridiculous. Eve got up and took the empty seat next to Chane.
“Sweetie, you’re a big girl, you can go on as many dates with as many guys as you want. Besides, you can’t keep playing the underage card forever. I know that in less than a year you’ll be legal.” She then put her hand under Chane’s chin and started caressing her. “And when that time comes, you’re all mine.” she said gently while staring into Chane’s eyes amorously.
“W-why are you looking at me like that. I don’t like it! It’s scary!” Chane panicked.
“You’re so cute when you’re terrified. You’re just my type.” teased Eve seductively as she patted the fearful Chane on the head. After the brief moment of what can only be considered subtle sexual harassment, she got up and went back to her original seat. I wasn’t sure if that Eve was being serious or if she was just screwing with Chane to the Nth degree. Sometimes it scares me how convincing she can be.
Meanwhile, Zack had called Lloyd from the table to join him in the middle of the food court to do battle with the other guy who I overheard give his name as Mike. “If you’re using Golduck, I’ll start with Balli!” he called throwing the Moon Ball. In a flash of light with star like effects came an oval shaped pink creature with long rabbit-like ears, stubby limbs, a pink tuft of hair on its forehead, a white belly, and huge blue eyes.
“You gotta be kidding me! A Wigglytuff? Man, even this guy’s Pokémon are feminine.” I said. I’m sure Zack thought the same thing as I did by the distraught look he had. He quickly shook the thoughts away and got ready to fight.
“Start with Screech Lloyd!” Zack called getting the battle underway. The Duck Pokémon opened his beak wide letting out loud honking noises that forced Balli to pull down its long ears to block the full sound. “Now that it’s off guard use Aqua Jet!” he followed up. Lloyd surrounded his body in water and crashed into his opponent at an incredible speed.
“Balli!” Mike cried worriedly as the Balloon Pokémon staggered back. “Counter with Body Slam!” he commanded once Balli regained its composure. The Wigglytuff inflated its body to being a third larger than before. Lloyd basically had an ‘Oh shit!’ face right up to the point Balli tackled him to the ground and lay on top of him.
“Even though that thing is light, use Strength to get it off!” commanded Zack. Balli’s eyes got bigger than normal as it was lifted up over the Golduck’s head before getting casually tossed aside.
“Who are you calling a thing?” demanded Mr. Bishie angrily. “Show this guy we mean business Balli! Thunder Bolt!” Mike yelled.
“Oh crap!” Zack cried as sparks started crackling around Balli’s body. “I would use Protect, like, now!” Just as Balli released its Electric attack, Lloyd’s jewel projected a transparent blue bubble around him that had a fluid look to it like water. Just like water, the Thunder Bolt struck it and was carried around the bubble and absorbed.
“That was close.” sighed Zack wiping his forehead. “Make sure it never happens again! Disable that attack Lloyd!” he commanded. The Duck Pokémon’s eyes started glowing blue and for half a second it looked as if a thin blue beam of the same color passed through the center of Balli’s head.
“Well so much for that idea.” Mike said calmly. “Guess I’ll just have to use the Wigglytuff line’s signature move. Sing for us Balli!” The Balloon Pokémon began singing a soft relaxing lullaby that even had me starting to nod off.
“Axel. If you’re still awake, I say we make sure we stay that way.” I suggested balling my fingers into a fist.
“Got it.” he agreed tiredly. At the same time we both punched eachother in the face to wake ourselves up. The pain would make sure we stayed conscious. Lloyd however wasn’t so lucky and was sound asleep.
“Man, buddy, of all the times to take a nap.” said Zack sarcastically.
“Now Balli! Hyper Voice!” Mike called. Balli opened its mouth wide and began screaming the loudest earsplitting sound I had ever heard. I could even see the sound wave vibrations streaming through the air at their unfortunate target. By some sadistic miracle, the Golduck remained asleep.
“How are you still snoozing after such a loud noise?” Zack asked his unresponsive Pokémon.
“If you wanted me to wake him up, you could have just asked. Use Wake-up Slap!” commanded Mike. The Wigglytuff waddled up to Lloyd and outright bitch slapped him in the face. Needless to say, he wasn’t a very happy kappa when he woke up.
“I know, that was such a rude awakening. Give Balli a headache with Zen Headbutt!” Zack told him. The Duck Pokémon placed his webbed claws on Balli’s shoulders, tilted his head back as it started to glow blue, and slammed it pointblank into the Wigglytuff’s cranium. When Lloyd pulled his head off of Balli’s, the Balloon Pokémon had tears in its eyes and was pouting. Lloyd started blushing with hearts in his eyes.
“You gotta be kidding me! You’re Wigglytuff is a girl with the Cute Charm Ability?” Zack called-out frustratedly.
“Wasn’t it obvious? You really are pretty bad with telling genders ya know?” mocked the Bishie. Poor Zack. This just isn’t his day. “Well whatever. Balli! Double Slap!” Balli did as told smacking Llyod with her flipper like hands eight different times by my count. Even after the abuse, the Golduck had a smile on his bill, and a loving look in his eyes.
“Get her back with close range Water Pulse!” called Zack. Rather than doing as told, Lloyd started showing off in an attempt to win Balli’s affections. “Oh come on! You two aren’t even in the same Egg Group!” he reminded. That’s when an interesting, if not highly amoral and evil, idea popped into my head.
“Zack! They may not be in the same Egg Group, but that just means Lloyd won’t become a father. Use his attraction to your advantage!” I informed him. By the devious grin Zack got, I knew he understood what I was telling him.
“Alright Lloyd, new plan! Forget the Water Pulse, instead use Mate!” commanded Zack a bit more enthusiastically than necessary. The Duck Pokémon didn’t hesitate for a second before he jumped Balli and started humping her. Mike screamed in horror as he brought out Balli’s Moon Ball and quickly returned her to its safety. Lloyd looked temporarily confused as to where his conquest had gone. As the Cute Charm wore off, he got back to his feet looking unamused by the ordeal.
“Oh Balli, I’m so sorry! I never meant for you to get violated.” he apologized to the sphere. “You animal!” he screamed at Zack.
“Hey now, it was his suggestion.” Zack defended pointing back at me while I laughed my ass off at how well my diabolical plan worked. “I just took his idea.”
“Yes, YOU took the idea!” yelled Mike getting out a second Moon Ball. “Star! Avenge your sister!” Emerging from the orb came another pink Pokémon, this one with long black-tipped ears, dark pink wings, a tuft on its head, and a large round tail.
“Alright Lloyd. It’s been a crazy battle so far, so use Calm Mind to relax a bit.” told Zack. Lloyd closed his eyes while taking slow, deep breaths to settle his thoughts.
“That won’t help you much! Time for Star’s signature move! Metronome!” Mike called. The Clefable held out both of its pointer fingers and began rhythmically shaking them back and forth. Next Star extended both its arms while glowing with an ominous white aura. That aura then shot out and surrounded Lloyd. While I think all of us were focused with anticipation as to what this attack was, I started to relax a bit when I noticed the Fairy Pokémon wincing in pain and Lloyd looking rejuvenated.
“Oh no! Why Pain Split?” cried Mike when he figured out the attack.
“Hey thanks for working in my favor. We appreciate you evening the playing field.” Zack commented happily once the attack stopped. “I’m feeling an Ice Beam would be an appropriate move now, what do you think Lloyd?” The Duck Pokémon responded by opening his bill and blasting a pale blue subzero beam made from frozen vapor at Star. The Clefable recoiled from the attack but otherwise seemed ok.
“If you were trying to freeze her, then that won’t work. Star has the Magic Guard ability, so neither of us has to worry about Attract or rape. Now attack with Iron Tail Star!” called Mike. The Fairy Pokémon’s tail hardened until it was sheening with a metallic silver. She then smacked the Golduck hard in the torso.
“Hang in there buddy.” encouraged Zack. “I’m glad to know we don’t have to worry about Cute Charm any more even if Star is a girl. Let’s celebrate with Tail Whip!” Lloyd nodded, walking up to the Fairy Pokémon and knocking her arms apart with his tail from the floor up. “Now Aqua Tail!” Zack continued. The Golduck surrounded his tail with water and swung it in the opposite direction smacking Star from the top of her head down.
“Retaliate with Double Slap Star!” called Mike. Once again poor Lloyd was on the receiving end of a furious session of bitch slaps across the face.
“I bet you’re tired of getting smacked around like this. Show Star what it feels like by using Fury Swipes!” Zack called. The Golduck honked affirmatively before repaying his opponent with a rapid series of slashes all across her torso.
“How dare you! Star! Use Shadow Ball!” the Gender Bender commanded. Star held her hands out in front of her chest and began gathering the shadows of Harbor Place into her palms. Once a swirling purplish black ball of adequate size had been created, the Clefable tossed it at Lloyd hitting him directly in the face. At this point the Duck Pokémon was panting from fatigue at having fought two battles already.
“You can do it Lloyd! Please win so I don’t have to go on a date!” Chane cheered on.
“Aw how cute. Our little girl is growing up.” Eve said with joking affection.
“You hear that Lloyd? Chane is counting on us to win. We can’t let her down!” Zack said passionately. “Now show our effeminate opponents your Psychic power!” Just as the Golduck’s eyes started glowing blue, Mike issued his next command as well.
“Counter with your Psychic Star!” The Clefable’s eyes also began to glow, but with a pinkish color instead.
The two Pokémon engaged eachother in a strength of the mind by sending their psychic auras to the battle field between them in a spectacular display of pink and blue. Words can hardly describe the swirling energy waves as they mixed together in a battle for supremacy. Both Pokémon were struggling to keep their focus lest they wanted the other to win and throw their attack back at them. I can only imagine what each of them is going through.
Finally, it looked as if Lloyd would win the struggle as the two auras merged into one taking on a deep violet color indicating the blue energy was in control. The Duck Pokémon even started slowly pushing his arms forward to add to the attack. Star dropped to one knee as she failed to keep control. At last Lloyd pushed all the pent up psychic energy forward in a massive ball. The Clefable cried out in pain as she was surrounded in such a heavy attack.
“Star!” Mike cried as the Fairy Pokémon collapsed to the ground. There was no response from the unconscious Clefable. “Damn! Well Mr. Kaguya, I guess you win. Balli and Star are my only two Pokémon.” I heard both Zack and Lloyd let out very audible sighs that the battle was over.
“Glad that’s over. Lloyd is my only Pokémon. You sure gave him a run for his money.” Zack said with relief.
“Ya don’t say. Well he’s really good then to take on both of my girls and win.” complemented the Bishie. After shaking hands, the two went back to their respective table to get back to their now cold lunches.
“Oh man, what day!” Zack sighed. “Me hitting on a guy does not leave this room you got that?” he told us while Chane fed Lloyd some Oran Berries. Suddenly Eve climbed up on the table for a reason we were sure to find out soon.
“Attention everyone!” she called out to the food court. “My friend Zack Kaguya here just hit on a guy! Take it as you will!” she announced playfully.
“Eve what are you doing!? I told you not to do that!” cried Zack frantically.
“You said it doesn’t leave the room. So I told everyone in the room.” she replied innocently having taken full advantage of Zack’s poor choice of words.
“Well ok fine, it doesn’t leave the table!” he corrected. “By the way, feel free to stay where you are. I’m enjoying the view.” Yes, obviously Eve didn’t think about the fact that standing on a table in a skirt would give everyone sitting there a view up said skirt.
“Then why don’t I give you a better view!” Eve offered darkly as she lifted her leg and gave Zack a heeled-boot to the face. That would be the reason I chose not to say anything. After causing Zack harm, Eve gracefully jumped off the table and went back to her seat.
“So worth the pain.” Zack said happily despite the red mark on his face.
*****************
For new readers:
Trap- noun- a male who can easily be confused for a female. Ex. Haku from Naruto
Bishie- abreviation of Bishonen- noun- a very pretty male. Ex. Half the guys in anime
Anyway, I wanted to post these last two chapters last night but a nasty headache cancelled those plans. But the important thing is they're here now.
Chapter 28: It’s A Trap!
Two months had passed since that fateful night at the Tin Tower. During that time my team became a lot more unified and better adapted to working together. We were able to pull off strategies at a moment’s notice that would have required a few minutes for us to talk out before. I also noticed that Chane stuttered less as she got more comfortable around us. I say less because she still gets nervous easily.
What hasn’t changed is that Eve will screw with our heads whenever possible, and Zack still shamelessly flirts with her, Chane, and just about every other human female we come across. I don’t know how Raiden puts up with us. Zack has also started leaving Lloyd outside of his Pokéball like I do with Axel. He said that until he met me, he thought all trainers kept their Pokémon in Pokéballs at all times. Being a former Ranger, it’s more comfortable having his partner out with him. As we all soon learned, Lloyd is as much of a Casanova as his trainer.
As for me, I have been training myself to control Dragon-Forme. While I don’t have complete mastery yet, I at least don’t become a berserker anymore unless I’m really riled up. Which brings up something I have learned about myself while doing this training. Prof. Himee was wrong about me, it isn’t anger that triggers the change, it’s battle lust. Even when I feel excited about combat, I’ve tended to transform. That adrenaline rush one gets right before a battle, that fight or flight response, whether you want to kill your enemy or if you’re doing it for fun, that is what activates Dragon-Forme. At least my rampages are limited now.
I even bought a book recently written by the Blackthorn City Dragon Clan Elder titled “The Myths, Legends, and Truths About Dragon Pokémon” with extensive detail on Dragon-types from stories about them, powers and abilities, and even sections on how to raise one. Sure it isn’t a scientific journal, but the man is still an expert as far as anyone else is concerned, plus the words are easier to understand. I figured this would help, not only with my training, but understanding myself as well.
But I’ve digressed long enough. It was now October, and on this particularly chilly night the five of us were on stakeout at Vermillion Harbor ready to do a drug bust on a Rocket cargo ship that was bringing some nasty stuff to Kanto from the Sevii Islands.
“So then the nurse says Lloyd has Pokérus and I’m like ‘Dammit Lloyd! I told you not to go after that Floatzel!’ Then the nurse says ‘No, no. Pokérus isn’t like that. It’s just a harmless bug Pokémon pick up from time to time like a human cold. It should clear up in a couple of days.’ Then Lloyd gives me an ‘I’m right, you’re wrong’ look.” Zack rambled as we waited with his Golduck nodding at every word proving his validity.
To pass the time we, or I should say Zack and I, shared stories of some of our past adventures. The girls and Raiden didn’t seem as interested in sharing as we were. Unfortunately story time was over as I noticed a black freighter pulling into the docks. The others noticed too so we wordlessly got into formation to ambush tonight’s victims.
As expected, people dressed in Rocket uniforms crawled onto the pier like the ants they were to unload their cargo. Or rather make their Machokes, Machamps, Poliwraths, Tentacruels, and in one case a Vigoroth, do all the heavy lifting. Lazy scum.
“Is everyone ready?” Raiden’s voice rang in my ear as we all now wore two way ear pieces for better communication.
“Yes Master Raiden!” I answered readily.
“Alright, launch Elemental Strike!” he commanded after a few seconds from getting everyone else’s responses.
“Elemental Strike it is!” I turned to Axel. “Go for it!” The Infernape opened his mouth blasting a Flamethrower at the Rockets. His attack was joined by a Hydro Pump from Lloyd, a Seed Bomb from Izzy, a Shadow Ball from Diva, and a Charge Beam from which ever Electric-type Raiden was using at the moment.
The criminals scattered in confusion and shock as the five attacks came at them from all directions. Of course we weren’t aiming for them (yet), we were targeting their Pokémon and the crates they carried. Axel’s Flamethrower hit a Machoke in its right arm causing it to drop its cargo. The box shattered when it hit the ground leaving its contents to scatter across the pier. Then the monkey burned that too. Similar results were met from my teammates.
“Alright! Show yerselves! We know ye’re out there so come out!” demanded one of the Rockets pulling a whip off his waist.
“Can I Master Raiden? I mean he did ask us.” I inquired into my earpiece.
“*Ugh* You are such a child. Must you always be so melodramatic?” Eve reprimanded from her end.
“Yup!” I responded cheerfully after a giggle.
“I hear you up there mocking me!” roared the Rocket.
“Well as you have already blown your position, go for it.” allowed Raiden. “We’ll be with you shortly.”
“Yoink!” I shouted jumping down from my perch into the open. As expected, they all looked a bit unnerved seeing a member of Team Neos. They regained their composures a lot sooner than I thought they would.
“There’s only one! Vigoroth! Attack!” yelled a female Rocket. The white furred Wild Monkey Pokémon charged at me with its claws bared presuming to tear me apart.
“A monkey battle is it? Axel! Double Kick!” I called.
“Attack!” shouted the Flame Pokémon jumping into the fray with his leg extended. His foot smashed directly into Vigoroth’s face followed by his other foot as he kicked off the shaggy haired baboon. “Is that it?” lamented Axel when he realized the other monkey was down for the count.
“Bastard you’ll pay for that! Get ‘im!” yelled another Rocket sending the remaining Pokémon after us.
“You may want to get off the ground.” Eve suggested. I grabbed Axel by his hand and jumped up just as a large bipedal blue rabbit with small spikes running down her back smashed into the pier sending tremors through the ground which cracked up the concrete and splintered the wood.
As I landed, Eve jumped off the back of her Nidoqueen. “Someone had to stop you from stealing the spotlight again.” she teased.
“But I have to steal the show. I am the main character after all.” I said casually.
“Of what? Your own twisted fantasy?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow. I smiled and nodded. “Freak.” muttered Eve rolling her eyes.
“Screw the Pokémon! These guys could never dodge a bullet!” shouted the previous Rocket pulling out a hand gun. Before he could even pull the trigger, the firearm was surrounded in a pink glow and yanked from his hands.
“I… I won’t let you hurt them!” Chane defended standing with the crescent moon shaped Pokémon Luna.
“Hey guess what? All their Pokémon are weak to Water-types!” pointed out another Rocket.
“Good eye.” complemented the one with the whip. “All Poliwraths and Tentacruels! Attack them with your Water moves!” he commanded. Within seconds Bubble Beams, Water Pulses, Water Guns, and Hydro Pumps were heading right for us.
“Protect!” called Chane. In an instant the six of us were surrounded by a pale pink barrier that resembled the moonlight on a hazy night.
“Hate to say it, but the Rocket’s right. I recommend you all take the high ground before I call my next attack.” warned Zack from his end. We each turned to eachother and nodded in agreement. Eve and Chane returned their Pokémon and then all of us ran the opposite direction of the harbor.
“Look they’re retreating!” I heard a foolish Rocket cheer. She won’t be laughing long. I turned around to see a large tidal wave advancing rapidly to shore with a Golduck riding it. The criminals all screamed when they saw it coming at them. Too bad they noticed too late as gallons of water came crashing down on them.
“They’re all yours Raiden!” Zack called. All at once six different sets of Thunder Bolts struck the soaked crooks and their Pokémon knocking all of them unconscious.
“Mission accomplished.” Raiden announced. Already? Either those guys were weak or we’re just that awesome. I’m going with both.
“Not yet.” I said walking to the Rocket vessel that had been lucky not to capsize with Lloyd’s Surf. “Axel.” I said turning to my Infernape.
“Understood.” he said blasting the hull with Flamethrower until there was a large glowing orange blotch on the side of the ship. Next I sent out Beldum and told it to smash through the weakened side with Iron Head followed by a Take Down to the bottom of the ship. The attack did no damage that I know of to the vessel, but it did force the hole we made to sea level causing the ship to take on water until it sank into the harbor.
“Now mission accomplished.” I said. Rather than kill the Rockets, we just left them for the police to handle. While I hated just letting them go, I really had no other choice in the matter. At least I got to destroy their ship and cargo.
-----------------------
The following day my squad and I were enjoying our lunch in a Vermillion food court called Harbor Place. We appeared to be just an ordinary group of trainers having a meal together. Harbor Place was pretty nice being two floors with food stalls around every corner serving all kinds of different yummies. In the center of the food court were tables for the patrons to sit at. There were also tables on a balcony outside, but being early Fall not many people were out there.
The seven of us were inside crowded around a long table fit for eight. On my side was Lloyd on the right end, Zack, me, and Axel on the left end. On the other side was Chane across from me and to her left Raiden followed by Eve on the end across from Lloyd. Zack had cracked a joke about Raiden pimpin’ it up with the ladies. Raiden responded with a blank look followed by a head shake.
“You know it to be true Raiden. Someone as devilishly handsome as you could get any-” Zack paused midsentence as a cute girl with short black hair wearing a pink sweater and tight jeans walked passed our table. His blue eyes followed the girl until he actually had to move his head to keep up with her. “Excuse me.” he apologized getting up from the table and chasing after her.
“You are such a womanizer Kaguya.” commented Eve shaking her head.
“Hey cutie. Are you eating alone? I’m Zack Kaguya. Mind if I join you?” inquired Zack when she sat down.
“Cutie?” she repeated with a confused look. “I’m sorry, I’m actually straight.”
“So am I. All this is is a casual lunch. We don’t have to call it a date if you don’t want to Miss.” he continued.
“Miss? I think you’re confused. I’m a guy.” HE stated matter-of-factly. Zack’s eyes got huge and his lower lip started quivering like he was about to freak out. Eve, Axel, and I on the other hand were laughing so hard we were crying and could barely breathe. I really shouldn’t be laughing though. I thought that was a girl too… It’s still funny as hell! Chane was bright red from such an odd revelation while Raiden had his face in his hand shaking his head.
“How embarrassing.” he sighed.
“This can’t be! You’re just messing with me right?” Zack asked in a panic. The Bishie responded by lifting up his sweater to show off a well toned chest and abs.
“With a body like this I’m either a dude, or I really need to lay off the steroids.” he joked pulling his sweater back down.
“So those A-cups I noticed were pec size not breast size.” analyzed Zack. “But why the hell must you where pink and tight pants?”
“Because only real men wear pink and these jeans are comfy.” The Bishie answered. “I’m sorry you got confused Mister… Kaguya was it?”
“Don’t worry about it. Zacky-boy is just bi-curious.” Eve teased with a giggle. I couldn’t help but snicker along with her.
“It’s not funny!” Zack whined looking at us. He turned back to the Gender Bender clearing his throat. “Look, I’m sorry for putting you through suck an awkward situation like this. Then again, seeing as how you’re probably the spitting image of your mother, you probably get this a lot.”
“Actually I’m told I look more like my father, and you are the first guy to ever come on to me.” Once again, hilarity ensued at our table as yet another nail was added to Zack’s coffin of shame. He just can’t get a break with this guy. Then I noticed Mr. Bishie looking our way. “Are any of those Pokémon yours?” he asked Zack.
“Yeah, the Golduck, why?” he answered unaware of the fact that this guy was most likely a fellow trainer looking for a battle.
“Battle?” the Gender Bender inquired holding up a black topped Pokéball with a yellow crescent moon on it. “If you win, it will at least give you back some of your pride. But if I win…” he trailed looking back at the table. “…I get to go on a date with the cute brunette in the back.” All of us turned to Chane.
“M-me? N-no! I… I can’t. I… I’m not old enough! I’m not allowed to go on dates until I’m eighteen.” she stammered nervously. We all looked at her with confusion. Not allowed to date? Even I find that a bit ridiculous. Eve got up and took the empty seat next to Chane.
“Sweetie, you’re a big girl, you can go on as many dates with as many guys as you want. Besides, you can’t keep playing the underage card forever. I know that in less than a year you’ll be legal.” She then put her hand under Chane’s chin and started caressing her. “And when that time comes, you’re all mine.” she said gently while staring into Chane’s eyes amorously.
“W-why are you looking at me like that. I don’t like it! It’s scary!” Chane panicked.
“You’re so cute when you’re terrified. You’re just my type.” teased Eve seductively as she patted the fearful Chane on the head. After the brief moment of what can only be considered subtle sexual harassment, she got up and went back to her original seat. I wasn’t sure if that Eve was being serious or if she was just screwing with Chane to the Nth degree. Sometimes it scares me how convincing she can be.
Meanwhile, Zack had called Lloyd from the table to join him in the middle of the food court to do battle with the other guy who I overheard give his name as Mike. “If you’re using Golduck, I’ll start with Balli!” he called throwing the Moon Ball. In a flash of light with star like effects came an oval shaped pink creature with long rabbit-like ears, stubby limbs, a pink tuft of hair on its forehead, a white belly, and huge blue eyes.
“You gotta be kidding me! A Wigglytuff? Man, even this guy’s Pokémon are feminine.” I said. I’m sure Zack thought the same thing as I did by the distraught look he had. He quickly shook the thoughts away and got ready to fight.
“Start with Screech Lloyd!” Zack called getting the battle underway. The Duck Pokémon opened his beak wide letting out loud honking noises that forced Balli to pull down its long ears to block the full sound. “Now that it’s off guard use Aqua Jet!” he followed up. Lloyd surrounded his body in water and crashed into his opponent at an incredible speed.
“Balli!” Mike cried worriedly as the Balloon Pokémon staggered back. “Counter with Body Slam!” he commanded once Balli regained its composure. The Wigglytuff inflated its body to being a third larger than before. Lloyd basically had an ‘Oh shit!’ face right up to the point Balli tackled him to the ground and lay on top of him.
“Even though that thing is light, use Strength to get it off!” commanded Zack. Balli’s eyes got bigger than normal as it was lifted up over the Golduck’s head before getting casually tossed aside.
“Who are you calling a thing?” demanded Mr. Bishie angrily. “Show this guy we mean business Balli! Thunder Bolt!” Mike yelled.
“Oh crap!” Zack cried as sparks started crackling around Balli’s body. “I would use Protect, like, now!” Just as Balli released its Electric attack, Lloyd’s jewel projected a transparent blue bubble around him that had a fluid look to it like water. Just like water, the Thunder Bolt struck it and was carried around the bubble and absorbed.
“That was close.” sighed Zack wiping his forehead. “Make sure it never happens again! Disable that attack Lloyd!” he commanded. The Duck Pokémon’s eyes started glowing blue and for half a second it looked as if a thin blue beam of the same color passed through the center of Balli’s head.
“Well so much for that idea.” Mike said calmly. “Guess I’ll just have to use the Wigglytuff line’s signature move. Sing for us Balli!” The Balloon Pokémon began singing a soft relaxing lullaby that even had me starting to nod off.
“Axel. If you’re still awake, I say we make sure we stay that way.” I suggested balling my fingers into a fist.
“Got it.” he agreed tiredly. At the same time we both punched eachother in the face to wake ourselves up. The pain would make sure we stayed conscious. Lloyd however wasn’t so lucky and was sound asleep.
“Man, buddy, of all the times to take a nap.” said Zack sarcastically.
“Now Balli! Hyper Voice!” Mike called. Balli opened its mouth wide and began screaming the loudest earsplitting sound I had ever heard. I could even see the sound wave vibrations streaming through the air at their unfortunate target. By some sadistic miracle, the Golduck remained asleep.
“How are you still snoozing after such a loud noise?” Zack asked his unresponsive Pokémon.
“If you wanted me to wake him up, you could have just asked. Use Wake-up Slap!” commanded Mike. The Wigglytuff waddled up to Lloyd and outright bitch slapped him in the face. Needless to say, he wasn’t a very happy kappa when he woke up.
“I know, that was such a rude awakening. Give Balli a headache with Zen Headbutt!” Zack told him. The Duck Pokémon placed his webbed claws on Balli’s shoulders, tilted his head back as it started to glow blue, and slammed it pointblank into the Wigglytuff’s cranium. When Lloyd pulled his head off of Balli’s, the Balloon Pokémon had tears in its eyes and was pouting. Lloyd started blushing with hearts in his eyes.
“You gotta be kidding me! You’re Wigglytuff is a girl with the Cute Charm Ability?” Zack called-out frustratedly.
“Wasn’t it obvious? You really are pretty bad with telling genders ya know?” mocked the Bishie. Poor Zack. This just isn’t his day. “Well whatever. Balli! Double Slap!” Balli did as told smacking Llyod with her flipper like hands eight different times by my count. Even after the abuse, the Golduck had a smile on his bill, and a loving look in his eyes.
“Get her back with close range Water Pulse!” called Zack. Rather than doing as told, Lloyd started showing off in an attempt to win Balli’s affections. “Oh come on! You two aren’t even in the same Egg Group!” he reminded. That’s when an interesting, if not highly amoral and evil, idea popped into my head.
“Zack! They may not be in the same Egg Group, but that just means Lloyd won’t become a father. Use his attraction to your advantage!” I informed him. By the devious grin Zack got, I knew he understood what I was telling him.
“Alright Lloyd, new plan! Forget the Water Pulse, instead use Mate!” commanded Zack a bit more enthusiastically than necessary. The Duck Pokémon didn’t hesitate for a second before he jumped Balli and started humping her. Mike screamed in horror as he brought out Balli’s Moon Ball and quickly returned her to its safety. Lloyd looked temporarily confused as to where his conquest had gone. As the Cute Charm wore off, he got back to his feet looking unamused by the ordeal.
“Oh Balli, I’m so sorry! I never meant for you to get violated.” he apologized to the sphere. “You animal!” he screamed at Zack.
“Hey now, it was his suggestion.” Zack defended pointing back at me while I laughed my ass off at how well my diabolical plan worked. “I just took his idea.”
“Yes, YOU took the idea!” yelled Mike getting out a second Moon Ball. “Star! Avenge your sister!” Emerging from the orb came another pink Pokémon, this one with long black-tipped ears, dark pink wings, a tuft on its head, and a large round tail.
“Alright Lloyd. It’s been a crazy battle so far, so use Calm Mind to relax a bit.” told Zack. Lloyd closed his eyes while taking slow, deep breaths to settle his thoughts.
“That won’t help you much! Time for Star’s signature move! Metronome!” Mike called. The Clefable held out both of its pointer fingers and began rhythmically shaking them back and forth. Next Star extended both its arms while glowing with an ominous white aura. That aura then shot out and surrounded Lloyd. While I think all of us were focused with anticipation as to what this attack was, I started to relax a bit when I noticed the Fairy Pokémon wincing in pain and Lloyd looking rejuvenated.
“Oh no! Why Pain Split?” cried Mike when he figured out the attack.
“Hey thanks for working in my favor. We appreciate you evening the playing field.” Zack commented happily once the attack stopped. “I’m feeling an Ice Beam would be an appropriate move now, what do you think Lloyd?” The Duck Pokémon responded by opening his bill and blasting a pale blue subzero beam made from frozen vapor at Star. The Clefable recoiled from the attack but otherwise seemed ok.
“If you were trying to freeze her, then that won’t work. Star has the Magic Guard ability, so neither of us has to worry about Attract or rape. Now attack with Iron Tail Star!” called Mike. The Fairy Pokémon’s tail hardened until it was sheening with a metallic silver. She then smacked the Golduck hard in the torso.
“Hang in there buddy.” encouraged Zack. “I’m glad to know we don’t have to worry about Cute Charm any more even if Star is a girl. Let’s celebrate with Tail Whip!” Lloyd nodded, walking up to the Fairy Pokémon and knocking her arms apart with his tail from the floor up. “Now Aqua Tail!” Zack continued. The Golduck surrounded his tail with water and swung it in the opposite direction smacking Star from the top of her head down.
“Retaliate with Double Slap Star!” called Mike. Once again poor Lloyd was on the receiving end of a furious session of bitch slaps across the face.
“I bet you’re tired of getting smacked around like this. Show Star what it feels like by using Fury Swipes!” Zack called. The Golduck honked affirmatively before repaying his opponent with a rapid series of slashes all across her torso.
“How dare you! Star! Use Shadow Ball!” the Gender Bender commanded. Star held her hands out in front of her chest and began gathering the shadows of Harbor Place into her palms. Once a swirling purplish black ball of adequate size had been created, the Clefable tossed it at Lloyd hitting him directly in the face. At this point the Duck Pokémon was panting from fatigue at having fought two battles already.
“You can do it Lloyd! Please win so I don’t have to go on a date!” Chane cheered on.
“Aw how cute. Our little girl is growing up.” Eve said with joking affection.
“You hear that Lloyd? Chane is counting on us to win. We can’t let her down!” Zack said passionately. “Now show our effeminate opponents your Psychic power!” Just as the Golduck’s eyes started glowing blue, Mike issued his next command as well.
“Counter with your Psychic Star!” The Clefable’s eyes also began to glow, but with a pinkish color instead.
The two Pokémon engaged eachother in a strength of the mind by sending their psychic auras to the battle field between them in a spectacular display of pink and blue. Words can hardly describe the swirling energy waves as they mixed together in a battle for supremacy. Both Pokémon were struggling to keep their focus lest they wanted the other to win and throw their attack back at them. I can only imagine what each of them is going through.
Finally, it looked as if Lloyd would win the struggle as the two auras merged into one taking on a deep violet color indicating the blue energy was in control. The Duck Pokémon even started slowly pushing his arms forward to add to the attack. Star dropped to one knee as she failed to keep control. At last Lloyd pushed all the pent up psychic energy forward in a massive ball. The Clefable cried out in pain as she was surrounded in such a heavy attack.
“Star!” Mike cried as the Fairy Pokémon collapsed to the ground. There was no response from the unconscious Clefable. “Damn! Well Mr. Kaguya, I guess you win. Balli and Star are my only two Pokémon.” I heard both Zack and Lloyd let out very audible sighs that the battle was over.
“Glad that’s over. Lloyd is my only Pokémon. You sure gave him a run for his money.” Zack said with relief.
“Ya don’t say. Well he’s really good then to take on both of my girls and win.” complemented the Bishie. After shaking hands, the two went back to their respective table to get back to their now cold lunches.
“Oh man, what day!” Zack sighed. “Me hitting on a guy does not leave this room you got that?” he told us while Chane fed Lloyd some Oran Berries. Suddenly Eve climbed up on the table for a reason we were sure to find out soon.
“Attention everyone!” she called out to the food court. “My friend Zack Kaguya here just hit on a guy! Take it as you will!” she announced playfully.
“Eve what are you doing!? I told you not to do that!” cried Zack frantically.
“You said it doesn’t leave the room. So I told everyone in the room.” she replied innocently having taken full advantage of Zack’s poor choice of words.
“Well ok fine, it doesn’t leave the table!” he corrected. “By the way, feel free to stay where you are. I’m enjoying the view.” Yes, obviously Eve didn’t think about the fact that standing on a table in a skirt would give everyone sitting there a view up said skirt.
“Then why don’t I give you a better view!” Eve offered darkly as she lifted her leg and gave Zack a heeled-boot to the face. That would be the reason I chose not to say anything. After causing Zack harm, Eve gracefully jumped off the table and went back to her seat.
“So worth the pain.” Zack said happily despite the red mark on his face.
*****************
For new readers:
Trap- noun- a male who can easily be confused for a female. Ex. Haku from Naruto
Bishie- abreviation of Bishonen- noun- a very pretty male. Ex. Half the guys in anime
) I also noticed some foreshadowing coming back up, with little hints here and there throughout your last few chapters. I'm looking forward to seeing what is to come, my friend. 
Story-wise, it's a good twist, but a sad one too. Brian should have left Creed alive. Why? I'm sure life would be a bitch for a bounty hunter with no arms (not to mention he couldn't use that damn button!) or he could just slowly and painfully bleed to death, but that's my opinion. 
