The Stupidity of Videogames

[Lucario454]

Have you ever gotten a video game and found something where the computer acts so stupid it's funny? I recently have.

In SSB: Melee, I wanted to see how I would do against a level nine Ness. I went to battle him in jungle japes, a favorite location of mine. My strategy is wait for them to come to you then knock them into the nearest gap in the stage. So I stood there and waited for him to get over to me. He proceeded to jump into the gap, fail to recover, and die in the river.

He does this every time! XD

So what about you?

 

[StellarWind Elsydeon]

Ooh. Dumb AIs. Gotta love them. In this one Genesis game I played recently, the enemies are so damn stupid they will randomly -WALK INTO YOUR SWORDS, to their death. It's just that lol.

Which I guess is a good thing because that bitch of a game is virutally impossible and VERY VERY VERY unforgiving >>;

 

[Doctor Oak]

Pokemon Stadium.

All of it.

 

[Hoenn Master]

Pokemon Stadium.

All of it.

Flippin' Chansey game. X0

I play the GCN James Bond games a lot (007: Nightfire FTW) and sometimes, when the game is set to random, you start with Satchel Charges. When in a faceoff with somebody, the computers, unable to become harder, lay down a Satchel Charge at their feet, and STAY THERE UNTIL THE FIVE SECONDS PASS.

Every time I start with those damn charges, I restart.


-AL

 

[Carmen Lopez]

The AI in Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn makes me lol sometimes. You can de-equip units (that is leave them unarmed) and generally the enemy CPUs will nearly ALWAYS go for the de-equipped unit even if they a)have a low chance of actually hitting, b)the de-equipped unit has more than enough defense/evasion to survive. It's pretty amusing to see enemy units pass by a weaker unit just to fight an unarmed one XD

And I was watching a Smash Brothers Brawl video on Youtube that was on Shadow Moses Island. An Assist Trophy spawned on the other side of a pillar, as in you CANNOT get to it, yet the CPUs tried to get it anyway. XD That was hilarious.

 

[Lucario454]

I was on youtube watching this CPU in a war game.( don't remember which one. ) He had his gun pointed at the sky and he was running around in circles. The player walked right in the middle of his loop, and watched him go round and round and....

There was this other guy who walked right up to a group of enemies. They didn't even look at him. Then the player threw rocks at their heads. THey just continued with thier dialogue. XD

 

[Linkachu]

Adding to what Alex said... Pokemon AIs really get me laughing sometimes (including Platinum, which is supposed to be the best in-game AI yet). I'll be up against a strong opponent, waiting for my death and picking a move simply for the sake of it... and the CPU either chooses a weak attack that can't kill me or something I can resist. I swear it's done that multiple times, although I see it a lot more often in PBR's double battles. The opponent will have a Pokemon with STAB SE hits against one of my Pokemon... but will attack the other Pokemon. Repeatedly. Even if they resist the attack. A win like that doesn't even feel satisfying XP

 

[KoL]

On the subject of Pokemon AI, it occasionally has major problems trying to deal with abilities that lend immunity to damage, especially the less common ones. Although it's always aware of Levitate, the AI on PBR seems quite happy to try and defeat my Electivire with Electric-type attacks, which do no damage and merely increase my Speed stat thanks to Motor Drive. Shedinja's Wonder Guard often creates a lot of comedy as well, with one example being in the Battle Factory where an opposing Clamperl attempted to use Water Pulse to defeat Shedinja, to no avail, before eventually finding the sense to use Toxic to get around Wonder Guard and KO Sheddy.

Brawl's had some rather stupid AI issues as well, which is surprising given Melee's (usually) impressive Lv.9 AI that was actually capable of chaining together moves into combos frequently enough for you to know that it knew full well what it was doing. Brawl's Lv.9s though are sadly disappointing - their only real claim to fame is their superhuman reaction speed, being able to instantly move on the very first frame of recovery from an attack. Otherwise, if it isn't Meta Knight getting edge-hogged for trying to use Dimensional Cape as a recovery move (MK getting edge-hogged should NEVER happen) or Snake blowing himself up with his own grenades and mines, then the AI is most likely off-stage letting itself get edge-guarded to hell and back, successfully turning all but the most amazing of recoveries (Dedede, MK, R.O.B. and Pit basically) into completely useless moves that may as well not exist. Another indication that the creators of Brawl spent too much time cramming as much as they could into the game and not enough time making sure the game itself was actually good...

Other than that, most of the enemy AI in games tends to be quite good. Now all we need to do is give Dom from Gears of War some chainsaw bayonet-style brain surgery and we're good to go...

 

[Spix]

A friend of mine had an interesting one with SSBB. She created a level with no base ground and all platforms, and the AI just couldn't cope with it. They'd start the fight at opposite sides of the screen, and the AI would try to get to her by jumping forward, until it would without fail fall between the same two platforms and die, then respawn, then jump, then die, etc.

 

[MadeOfFail]

I was playing SOCOM idk which one but it would not absolutely WOULD NOT let me plant the bomb

 

[Mindel]

I've had my share of Pokemon AI problems.

In my hardest battles against even Pokemon that are way higher in level than mine, I end up taking them out in several hits. Even when the stakes are high.