Okay, I've read all the posts on the RP now - writing my reply.
Anyway, @Zman890 I'm sorry, I could barely read your post. And I understand why VIcc said the Gengar can't talk, you didn't imply at all the brother was speaking. And I don't really like how Jake's at the house and he pretty much just teleports to the Pokemon Center - I have no rights to make you change that though. Anyway, you've made a lot of spelling mistakes and don't have proper punctuation and grammar. You don't have to correct everything, but try to make it more clearer to read? These are some examples of the bad sentences -
The one that manly attention was a Eevee. (Spelling mistakes...'that manly attention'? 'was a Eevee'?)
Jake was In his House Packing Up for the Adventure he was about to go when His brother and his Gengar Came in and said. "Watcha Doing Idiot." (Really sounds like the Gengar said that, and why is most words capitalized? You need to use commas as well.)
He went Inside The Center and saw their was alot of People in their. (Not using the proper homophone for 'there' and capitalizing wrong...)
Just please try to edit your post to make it more clear, and in the future please use proper spelling, punctuation and grammar, just remember, not everything as to be perfect. Just don't make it really difficult to read. You could also detail it a bit more, rather than just saying "After walking around for a While Jake Found a Pokèmon Center." Its like he just teleported outside and then went straight into a Pokemon Center..
Anyway, @Zman890 I'm sorry, I could barely read your post. And I understand why VIcc said the Gengar can't talk, you didn't imply at all the brother was speaking. And I don't really like how Jake's at the house and he pretty much just teleports to the Pokemon Center - I have no rights to make you change that though. Anyway, you've made a lot of spelling mistakes and don't have proper punctuation and grammar. You don't have to correct everything, but try to make it more clearer to read? These are some examples of the bad sentences -
The one that manly attention was a Eevee. (Spelling mistakes...'that manly attention'? 'was a Eevee'?)
Jake was In his House Packing Up for the Adventure he was about to go when His brother and his Gengar Came in and said. "Watcha Doing Idiot." (Really sounds like the Gengar said that, and why is most words capitalized? You need to use commas as well.)
He went Inside The Center and saw their was alot of People in their. (Not using the proper homophone for 'there' and capitalizing wrong...)
Just please try to edit your post to make it more clear, and in the future please use proper spelling, punctuation and grammar, just remember, not everything as to be perfect. Just don't make it really difficult to read. You could also detail it a bit more, rather than just saying "After walking around for a While Jake Found a Pokèmon Center." Its like he just teleported outside and then went straight into a Pokemon Center..