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Steal the Briefcase!

Little known fact: the Megalodon loves piano. I play a tune for it, and it's so bad that it causes the Megalodon to gag, spitting you and the breifcase out. As the breifcase slips out of your hand, I grab it and toss it to an army of Sentrets all holding Focus Sashes, which form a sphere around the breifcase, and roll into the sunset.
 
I get my own piano and play another tune to tame the Megalodon, which then swallows the Sentrets and the briefcase again. Since I've tamed the Megalodon, and the Megalodon has the briefcase, i have the briefcase now.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I stab Yoshi the moment they drop the briefcase and grab the briefcase and poof away via dark magic and put have an impossible to break electro-barrier that shocks you the moment you step 3 inches towards me
 

TheJustinMann

Previously TheJustinMan
I ask the Medic to Ubercharge me, which makes me invincible for the next 8 seconds, and step through the barrier so I can grab the briefcase, and store it among my collection of fine wines and cheeses.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I burn down your fine wines and cheeses, screaming "YOULL NEVER CATCH ME, HALF COPPAAH!" and grab the briefcase and shoot you down
 

TheJustinMann

Previously TheJustinMan
As I respawn, Soldier is already chasing you down with rocket jumps, screaming"SURRENDER NOW AND YOU WILL BE HARMED". He doesn't jump on you, but grabs the briefcase and throws it in the cap zone, sending it back to wherever it came from.

*everyone on RED team now has crits*
 

Anomaletix

Previously Keet
Me, being the responsible (and spectator) user I am, I respawn as scout, drink some BONK! and run into combat. Bullets, flames, and rockets fly as I quickly run to the briefcase. Then, grabbing it, I quit out of the match.

Into Minecraft I go, I hack in some bedrock on a deserted island, cover the briefcase in bedrock, and start relaxing, sipping on some BONK! Atomic Punch as the breeze pokes my head.
 

TheJustinMann

Previously TheJustinMan
I have creative permissions, so I zap into Minecraft, TP to you and destroy the bedrock. I then steal the briefcase and put it under safe keeping with GlaDOS.
 

Anomaletix

Previously Keet
After realizing this happened, I get frustrated and zap into PORTAL 2. Inside, I start to break the game by using speedrunning tricks and clipping through walls by standing on alarm clocks. Confusing. I know. And then, after breaking into GlaDOS's room and exploding it by breaking the laws of psychics, I nab the briefcase.

Going into TF2, the most reasonable thing to do was to invite some hacker bots (mind you, with aimbot, auto spin, rapid fire, god mode, being able to see cloaked spies, etc) to protect the briefcase. Every square inch is covered in Heavies. You cannot even see the briefcase. Not even a medic will be able to help you.
 

TheJustinMann

Previously TheJustinMan
After being killed 3 times, I realize the briefcase is being guarded by hacker bots. So I call up my uncle who works at Valve(XD) and have him send those hackers on a VACation. I then teleport the briefcase into my arms, with Valve permission, and throw it into BOTW, where I put it inside a Guardin Stalker. And then I call up his buddies to help him protect it.
 

Anomaletix

Previously Keet
Being fooled again, he traveled to BOTW.

Finding the guardian stalker, he started to strategize. A sudden realization occured. Ancient arrows were basically a one hit kill. Going to the lab to craft some arrows, he came back, with a ton of arrows. With an amiibo, he rode forth on his motorcycle, sniped the guardian buddies with the ancient arrows, hitting the eyes, and then sniping the active guardian with another ancient arrow. Grabbing the briefcase, he warped to another game.

Into YIIK he went. This is a perfect area! Nobody wants to play this game, so nobody will find it! To have more pain, he put it in the deepest area of the Mind Dungeon. Finally done with the job, he started to relax near the briefcase.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I use my pet rat from NITW, Rabies and a baseball bat and track you down in YIIK. I don't even know what this game is! Rabies sniffs you down and I find you. "This bat is the bat that will pierce the HEAVENS!!!!" I say, beating the hell out of you and taking the briefcase.

Then, I make my own pocket dimension styled like The World's Hardest Game and make a fake briefcase, taking the real one and poof away into Hiveswap, keeping it with Trizza Tethis.
 

Anomaletix

Previously Keet
"You naive idiot." I say. Using my app, which tracks the briefcase, I warp into Hiveswap and hunt it down. Finding Trizza Tethis, I (legally) spawned in the Eraser tool and deleted Trizza Tethis.

Nabbing the briefcase, I warp into FNAF 4 and find the locked box. There, using glitches, I put the briefcase into the box. "Heh, im good at this," I say. Finding a good spot, he made a lookout near the box.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
"Curses." I mumble, but knowing this is my chance to cause havoc. I become the size of a molecule, but strong as Shazam. I sneak into the box, turn the briefcase the size of a molecule as well, take it, and while I'm at it I key Keet and Justin's cars. Then, I eat the briefcase, turn back to normal size and warp into Papers Please and warp all the other people here and block all warps. "I'm good at this."
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I try to process the recent events, having someone pull a briefcase out of my stomach via the arm, but take back the briefcase and have it turned to regular size and get to Glory Greatest, and using ULTRA power, have contraband planted on the people that were warped here.
 

Anomaletix

Previously Keet
Being the kool kid I am, I dis-enchant the briefcase, warp into Pokemon, and then give it to Lance. This Lance has infinite full restores, lvl 100 dragonites, sturdy, and take 2x less damage to anything. You get the briefcase by winning.
 
I Legion run through The Realm of The Entity and into Pokemon and stab Lance. Now he has to mend for eight seconds otherwise he will bleed out. Meanwhile, I can then stab him and he still will bleed out and die. I grab the intel, and Legion run back to The Realm of The Entity.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I frown, not liking scary games. I gain an idea! I go into my Mastered Ultra Instinct form, and filled with the spirit of Shaggy himself, dude! I teleport behind MA and poke his neck, killing him instantly. I then use a spirit bomb at 3.73% of Shaggy's power, which decimates the realm, and I key MA's car as well. I grab the briefcase and gulp it with a vegan burger and turn off Shaggy's power, but still MUI.
 
I scream: "FOOL! YOU HAVE TRIGGERED MY TRAP CARD!" for I then stand back up right in front of Philucifer as the one, the only, Overcharge Freddy, stronger than 100 Shaggies at 100% power. I blink at you and you fall asleep. Then I appear behind you, prepare my hand knives, and stab you right through your chest, killing you. There, I grab the briefcase and take it to the Dream World, where my powers are 10 times more effective.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I respawn in Dream World and say, "Goddamn." I use sheer force of will to destroy the Dream World and send it flying to the sun, also Overcharge Freddy into the real world and send him into the sun as well, me screaming, "WELCOME TO PRIMETIME!" I take the briefcase and fly away in a private jet binge-watching Moonkitti.
 
"Forgive me master... for I must go all out... just this once," I say as I absorb the entire sun and transform into 5 blink Nurse. I blink across the stratosphere into the private jet. I choke the pilot of the private jet, and use my telekinesis to pick up Philucifer and throw him out of it, but I grab the briefcase out of his hands beforehand.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I use my flying broomstick and wand to cast Aguamenti and spray it at the nurse until she dies. I leave the briefcase but attach a hidden bomb in it and fly away.
 
I slowly stroll over towards Philucifer and say: "OK, so that was a weird last few minutes or so... wanna call this thing off? I'm really tired of it." I hold my arm out for a hand shake.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I shake your hand, "Yeah, ok." I snap my fingers and the universe resets and the briefcase is encased in an urn. "Coolio."
 
"Dude, what the feck did you do? I literally just wanted to call a truce, not have you reset everything!" I unsnap the Universe reset and storm off without taking the briefcase. I sit in my house and watch TV. I crack open a beer bottle and glug it all down.
 

Spachino

Previously El Spazzino
I challenge EeviumZ to a Pokemon battle and send out my Magikarp and uses Magikarp's Revenge. Magikarp begins splashing in a pool of your blood as he locks onto your Milotic. The last thing you ever saw was a lightning bolt striking Milotic as I take the briefcase and run off.
 
"Alright, I lied. I'm still going for it!" I say as I Falcon Punch the Magikarp. I then grab the briefcase and teleport away into the rift of time. If you destroy the rift, all of time is destroyed along with it.
 
I returned to my life and I was on the rift, I took the briefcase and then I said "Oh no, I'm going to die" But I didn't, I teleport to Giratina's dimension and he reguired me and the briefcase
 
Giratina was my friend and let me capture him, so I just took the briefcase mounting Giratina. It was funny because I opened the briefcase and put a bomb for the next person that would steal the briefcase
 
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